There's no such thing as a free condom
You know you've seen them somewhere. At my dorm, I don't have to go past the lobby to see free condoms pushed at me, offering me the chance to live out my sexual desires without consequence.
A condom promises to exempt you from consequence. At the health center, you see numerous pamphlets about the dangers of sexually transmitted diseases and next to them a big bowl of condoms. The message is clear- if you want sex without the consequences, just get a condom and have some nice, safe sex. This way, you don't have to worry about hooking up with that questionable guy or girl- you get all the pleasure and none of the fallout.
It's time we all saw the truth- there's no such thing as a free condom.
The problem is that "safe sex" is an oxymoron. The only safe sex is no sex, and the consequences of using a condom are always going to be infinitely higher than abstaining. Just from doing a little research, you'll find not only that condoms don't completely prevent pregnancy, but that they are even worse at preventing against STDs. But don't take it from me, the CDC says specifically:
The surest way to avoid transmission of sexually transmitted diseases is to
abstain from sexual intercourse, or to be in a long-term mutually monogamous
relationship with a partner who has been tested and you know is uninfected.
Yet the message we get from the media and our society is that abstinence and monogamy just aren't feasible. We young adults are controlled by our hormones and simply can't control our sexual impulses. This excuse doesn't fly in real life. If people break laws because they aren't able to control their internal impulses, we put them in mental institutions or jail. Bodily needs do not supersede responsibility when it comes to the law, and it shouldn't work as a justification here either.
Responsibility works. I know abstinence is feasible because I've done it for the last 20 years of my life. It hasn't been the easiest thing, but by taking responsibility for my own actions, I have avoided the consequences of failed relationships, pregnancy scares, STDs, unwed pregnancies and abortions. I'm not superhuman; I just know that I have to take responsibility for myself.
We are told we can do anything we put our minds to, yet at the same time, our sexual drives are not our fault. This double standard only creates more problems for our society. It's time we started taking responsibility for our own actions. So the next time you see a bowl of "FREE CONDOMS!" just think to yourself- How much do they really cost?
Like it or not, you may be the one paying the price.
So what do you think? Besides saying my email address was btidwell@tulane.edu, they got a lot of it right. This was in the views section, and the opposing article went along the lines of "your sex life is none of my business and mine is none of yours"- don't take risks if you aren't ready, but sex is fun. At the very end was something I have to take issue with- essentially the writer said sex shouldn't be reserved as something special and sacred. If you're into different kinds of sex, it may not be a good thing, and could make for an unhappy marriage.
I wonder how many people truly think that? I made no moral arguments in my piece, but I have to believe sex is somewhat special and sacred, and that even if you're into different things when you get married, that relationship is all about working with your husband or wife's needs and respecting and accommodating them. After all, relationships are based on love, not sex, right?
I'd like to see what people have to say on this topic, so I'll shut up and let people vent at me.
-Brad
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